My Wednesday rewind is not a rewind of a former post or blog. It's about a rewind in my own life personally.
Over the last few months of blogging and posting I've sort of gotten lost. With the fear of misspelled words, grammatical errors and correct sentence structuring looming over me I have lost who I am as a blogger. I read so many fantastic blogs, whose sentences flow from the page like liquid art, that I'm intimidated and insecure. With that cloud of doubt hanging over me I have tried in vain to reproduce structures borrowed from minds way more brilliant than mine.
It is with this train of thought I write today, this, my Wednesday rewind.
When I first became a blogger I was filled hope that there would be something in me that would touch others. That God would pour out of me all the things He had stored there to use for His Glory. I used to pray over each one, wanting His words to be my words. That His heart would be my heart. Sadly, I have come to the realization that somewhere, somehow I got off track.
Hammering out on the keys words drawn from my own imagination, while good, were not necessarily something He asked me to share. Concern about not looking ignorant on screen filled me with trepidation each time I hit the share button. Doubt turning to disillusionment when it seemed no one would read it. Purposing in my heart that next time I will write a better blog with better sentence structures and fancier words in fluffed up phrases, left me with a heavy heart and stinging conscience. Before I knew it blogging had become my Achilles heel and no one was being blessed by them.
As of today I am changing that. As of today I am going to be who I am. I won't always write my sentences correctly, although I will try. I won't always be grammatically correct even though I will do my best.
I ask that you, my friends and fellow blogger's forgive me.
From this day forward I have purposed that my blog is to lift Jesus up and not myself. I would rather have the applause of one, God alone, than the worship of a multitude walking the wrong pathway. I desire to speak only what He gives and only when He gives it. I've purposed to Glorify Him in all things written or spoken from now on.
If I get it wrong, as far as grammar is concerned, I apologize now. My wish is to stay as true to what God puts within me to give. There is no greater reward I could have than knowing that I was obedient in what God called me to give.
I don't have tons of knowledge, nor do I have the ability to write in such a way that feels like you have been to church. I do, however have a call to be real. I have a call to be passionate in my pursuit of Christ. I have a mandate to be honest before all. I have a call to show people God's heart. Writing has a been a way to do this. Unfortunately, I got way off track. For that I'm truly sorry.
I encourage you today that you stay true to what God has put on your heart to say. Don't change who you are for the sake of likes and re post. When you speak /write what He gives, it always reaches exactly who HE intended it to reach.
The mark is what you reach for, the prize is Jesus.
I leave you with the words of Paul;
And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him.
I'm hid with Christ!